Oct 6

Already suspected pregnancy due to symptoms last week of September... but didn't want to put the cart in front of the horse.... 

On Saturday, 10/3, after Gamer Dash 5k, I discussed symptoms with sis-in-law and she said many were very likely! Over the last week-ish many "strange" and unusual things have been happening. I wasn't overly optimistic but thought the idea funny if we conceived right away in the first month!!! Felt very nauseous on Friday, and told hubby if I still felt that way, I wanted to pee on a stick. Melissa said they had an additional preggo test they could bring down on Sunday for us. I said yes! 

10/4 Sunday- getting a massage and my boobs were so sore being face down on the table.... Lisa BET James a nice bottle of wine that I was preggo and he dashed off to the store to get tests! Before I even washed my hands the second pink line began to appear! Not even faint! I let James time 3 minutes and he said he already suspected when my nose was so sensitive! But now proof! He wants a second test for morning with the digital one, though one already confirmed! I beyond elated! Ecstatic! Not even a single period, which is fine with me! We both pray only for a healthy baby, boy or girl! Holy smokes- were official expecting! 

Update: second digital test at 1:30 am on Oct 5 confirmed! "yes+!" I'm officially a mother-to-be! Keeping news quiet until the "safe" timeframe, though I'm bursting to tell everyone!!! Baby is size of a poppyseed at 4 weeks; technically a blastocyst still, but already creating havoc... And CLEAVAGE! Update: a bitty belly popped out overnight on 10/6! Belly did NOT look like this yesterday even! Wow! All water weight so far. Mild cramping. Appt set for intake/blood work Monday, 10/12.

THIS IS THE SPARTAN!!!!

THIS IS THE SPARTAN!!!!

To start, let me say this is the single hardest thing I have ever done in my life. More challenging than running the 1/2 marathon, harder than my toughest Taekwondo test, more grueling even than hiking to the top of Deseret Peak or the 18.2 mile round trip up Timpanogos. WE ARE SPARTANS!!!

James says in over 20 years of being an athlete and fighting at an elite level, he feels ACCOMPLISHED having earned our "finisher" t-shirts and medals! :) Thank goodness he was by my side!!! This was absolutely a team event, and I literally could NOT have done it without him! We trained for an entire year, and actually did what we started last year!

The Spartan course is in Soldier Hollow in Midway, UT on the Olympic cross-country site at 5,000 ft elevation, but that didn't help cool the incredible 100-degree heat and still air... the dust and of course, MUD!

Our course was just over 8 miles with STEEP grades up the mountain and down, and of course, up again. I did NOT wear my FitBit as it would've utterly killed it as one obstacle was going under an UNDERWATER wall! (Yes, we had mud....everywhere!) Two days and four showers later I found mud in my right ear still!

We leapt into mud pits, crawled through mud under barbed wire, went over cargo nets, threw javelins, hauled atlas stones... and for every skipped or failed obstacle, the penalty was 30 burpees. To protect my injured shoulder I skipped the rings and monkey bars, and could not complete the rope climb, and much to my utter distress, my spear skiffed off the edge of my target and I ended up doing my 30 penalty burpees. James threw his spear so hard it vibrated the entire target but didn't stick as he hit the frame, so 30 burpees for him too!

The trail portion was single-file and so so so steep both up and down... at some points you just sat down and slid down the trail and tried not to knock everyone down like dominoes. About mile 3 I had brutal heat headache - and we ended up walking and though they had around 6 water stops on the course and we carried water with us in our Camelbacks, there was heat shimmer off the ground and even dousing myself in water didn't keep me cool enough. 

At the Monkey Bars, I got 20 burpees into my 30 (for skipping the obstacle - my goal was to avoid wrenching my shoulder...) and I got pretty gaggy... ended up having to lie down in the shade for a bit to recover... then finished my 10 burpees and off we went. However, I was FAR from the only one bent over in the bushes.. even quite fit athletes were struggling with the intense heat. Thankfully I didn't actually throw up, but the heat and exertion both were a lot for most people. And one guy dislocated his shoulder and medical hauled him off the mountain in a dune buggy.... ouch.

As for me, I wasn't AFRAID of any obstacle - though James definitely helped me with a lot of them... like the inverse wall, or the 6', 7' and 8' walls (which were all painted BLACK- YEOW! Sizzling hot!!!) and I helped him with the "Hercules Hoist" - a sandbag pulley and to get over the 8' wall he used my knee as a jump-off point. I also got a butt-boost out of the mud bogs by a very nice gentleman behind me so I could grab James' hand and he could haul me up out of the mud as it was a vertical clay wall and I wasn't able to jump high enough to catch the edge. Spartans work as a team! Even unknown Spartan um... "boosters!" HA!

The vertical cargo net wall, however, did give me a moment where I realized that "Risk of Death" waiver was serious. Here I was 30 or 40 feet in the air straddling about a foot-wide metal frame and my little legs straining to reach over and catch the net on the other side.... and realized I really DID need to watch what I was doing. Just a split-second of being VERY aware, but I obviously got through safely and that was my only point of hesitation. One woman froze over the final obstacle, however, and my very sweet husband sat on the top with her to encourage her to put her leg over, and she finally made it down. But she was genuinely afraid. He is so kind to help her out! (And me! He literally did nearly every obstacle twice - first throwing me over it, and then having to do it himself!!! He's amazing!)

And I learned that I don't really like going under water that you can't see through very much. Not afraid, just don't really like it. I also lost my weightlifting gloves on that obstacle - they were velcroed to my waistband and didn't survive the thick mud. And my sunglasses I threw away after the race as they got cracked and weren't worth trying to save. In all I did 125 burpees (the REAL kind, with a full pushup!) including my 5 mandatory burpees on the Atlas carry.

After dousing ourselves repeatedly (the BEST part was having the spigots they use for snowmaking turned on with glacially-cold water that we soaked ourselves under) and scrambling up, down and through obstacles, we were dirty, gritty, grubby, fatigued and sooooo accomplished! 

We held hands and leapt the fire wall at the end to go through the finish line arch, collect our SHINY finisher medals, hose off in the "showers" (freezing cold spray nozzle hoses) and get our SPARTAN FINISHER t-shirts... James wore his to morning workout, but I actually wore mine to work! (I can't wait for casual Friday - and we'll be in the Tetons by then anyway!) 

I AM SO VERY PROUD OF US FOR ACCOMPLISHING WHAT WE SET OUT TO DO!!! We came in at 4 hours 15 mins and while I would've loved a better finish time, the point is that we finished - especially given extreme heat and course difficulty. (By comparison, another set of our friends spent 9 hours, 11 mins and 51 seconds on the course.) 

I am very excited for them to post our on-course pictures... James was fried and we didn't get our free finisher's photos at the end - which I would have liked... but he did grudgingly stand for a photo at our car (JUST as the blasted clouds rolled in and the wind picked up! MURPHY!!!! It was brutally hot and still the whole time we were on the course!)  So for now we only have the photos at the beginning and end as I had to (obviously) leave my phone in the car. I also was sad I couldn't wear my FitBit but I would've destroyed it in the mud.

The obstacles for our course:

1) Mud bogs x3

2) "Over, under, through" set of 3 walls to go over, under and through a keyhole  (and the rest of the following mile+ was straight uphill! Though the cactus were blooming! SO PRETTY IN PINK & YELLOW!)

3) Cinderblock chain drag

4) Sled pull

5) Rings

6) Rope climb from moat

7) Hercules Hoist - Pulleys

8) Zig-zag walls

9) Underhand rope climb "Tyrolean Traverse"

10) Atlas stone plus 5 mandatory burpees and carry back (Atlas = big rounded granite stone)

11) "V" cargo net

12) Inverted wall

13) Tire flip

14) Vertical cargo net wall

15) Monkey Bars

16) Underwater wall

17) Sandbag carry

18) Bucket Brigade (carry up and down a hill)

19) Javelin Throw

20) 6', 7' & 8' walls

21) Cargo net & "Comb"

22) Barbed wire mud slide

23) Run-up incline rope wall

24) 7' jump up ladder wall

25) Fire Jump

Next up is training for the elite Sprint - 3 to 5 mile course!

BOOYA!

Strawberry Moon

Barefoot I walked under a rising Strawberry Moon in its distinctly golden glow, the cheery trill of crickets gave me a beat of silence as I passed by, a whisper of leaves in a warm and restless wind as distant cars rolled under the thumping heartbeat of a helicopter winking its way in Christmas colors across a dusky sky.

I hear the teeth of sheep pulling at the clover like Velcro coming apart in little tugs, and the flabby exhale of a horse as velvety rubber lips chatter. A star shimmers overhead as my feet gobble up the pavement, smooth and rough both, bare toes splat through puddles still warmed by the long day's sun. I hear the nasal Doppler whine of a motorcycle climbing through its gears and the soft clink of dinner plates through a bronzed kitchen window.

A wheezy drone of a scooter sighs like biddies gossiping over tea, and the first throbbing hum of an air conditioner provides a bass note to the halogen street light's high-pitched buzz. A distant dog barks; a girl laughs, a car stereo grunts by. The tisking sprinklers stop their scolding and lights wink out as the full moon rises and I turn my feet toward home.

Lessons from "Penguins of Madagascar" - Validation & Inclusion

I was watching the animated movie "Penguins of Madagascar" and while quite punny, (and a bit silly), there was a message that struck home with me.

The lead penguin, Skipper, keeps telling the others "You're a meaningful and valued member of this team." but never says this to one penguin named Private. Private is desperately seeking this approval, and through the antics of an animated film, keeps trying to prove his worth to Skipper who sees him merely as cute and cuddly, but utterly disregards every other aspect of his worth, smarts, or his attempts at contributing to the team. Skipper continues to devalue him as he sees him as merely a pretty face.

Sure, it's an animated film. But there's also a deeper lesson here that we tend to superficially judge others based on our EXTERNAL objectification of them. We comment on a woman's weight loss (or gain) or a man's financial prowess but rarely about their personal characteristics. Even in our work environments, rarely are we truly acknowledged as a VALUABLE member of the team.

I recently started a new job - and while challenging and having a steep learning curve, immediately I felt included as a new member of the existing team and was thanked sincerely for all my work (which to me seems minor as I'm still training for each task before I can complete it and still have to ask a lot of questions.)

I was acknowledged in my first week as a "meaningful and valued member of this team." In week one! As a new hire! Who spent most of the first day just trying to set up logins and change temporary passwords. (I also got a company mug and tumbler and felt very special that they ordered me an ergonomic keyboard and had it send via expedited shipping to get to me.) But more than the physical presents, (YAY PRESENTS!) I was acknowledged by every single member of my new team as a valuable addition and told they were glad to have me. They were truly grateful for the work which I could complete, and complimented me on my ability to be trained to a task and then perform it with relatively little further instruction.

They also appreciated my note-taking so that I could do the same task again without having to be re-instructed on the steps, as well as me noting any aberrations or issues with the task with enough detail to resolve it later. Wow! They paid attention to my work, gave me thoughtful and considerate feedback, and gave me sincere thanks! HOW MEANINGFUL THIS IS!

I felt included and validated, and eager to return to my new workplace! Me? Wanting to get up and go to work in the morning? WHO IS THIS WOMAN?!?! It's because I feel acknowledged for my contribution, small as they may seem to me. And it feels wonderful! 

So take a moment today to tell those around you - whether family, co-workers, roommates or friends HOW MUCH they actually matter. Too much of our world focuses on the negative, and everything we've done WRONG, and rarely acknowledges what we've done right. So take that moment, even if it seems a minor thing to you, it may be a major thing to another. 

Thank you for reading my blog! You are a valued member of my team! :)

New Year's Resolutions - one month follow up!

HAPPY GROUNDHOG'S DAY! It's a new month! How are you doing on your New Year's Resolutions?

For me, I am WINNING at exceeding my goal of 2 books a month (I read 6!)
*I got sketching again (including finding LOADS of old sketchbooks!!!!) Goal is to sketch at least once a week.
*I have been very consistent in my workouts and made up the one conditioning class I missed (And for this new month I've now moved to mornings and 3 days a week from 2 evenings a week.)
*I also did great at keeping up to date on writing (I am behind from this crazy weekend of racing/black belt ceremony/late nights at work, but I'll catch up!)
*I missed a couple days of my 30 days of yoga due to sickness (and one day on the 2nd of Jan. because I simply forgot! I wasn't in the habit yet! HA!) but I did yoga the majority of the month and seeing improvement in strength, balance and coordination!
*Worked with my physical therapist on my injuries and seeing enormous improvement! My range of motion in my shoulder is unbelievable now! :D
*I rode my horses, and now that I'm taking the morning conditioning classes, I'll have more evenings free to ride. YAY! :)
*I set up my "Warm Fuzzies" file again - every time something makes me happy, makes me feel good, personal epiphanies, compliments, etc... a slip of paper goes in and at the end of the year (or bad days!) I can re-read them and perk up!
*My blog has had 4,731 views! WOW! o.O
*TOMORROW I start a digital photography course in continuing education at UVU!
*Also, I ran my first race of 2015 toward my goal of one 5k/month and set a very good time on my least favorite $%#(&*$^) hilly course despite not having raced in 8 months nor run farther than a mile in 4! (And only got the okay from my PT to run that mile last week!)

Areas that need improvement:
*I haven't been working consistently on my Spanish.... not only learning it, but speaking it as well. We did watch "The Princess Bride" in Spanish - it loses a lot being dubbed over....
*While I did play the piano, I didn't meet my goal of practicing at least an hour a week. Gotta work on that.
*Archery practice!
*Working on enough strength to finally master Crow Pose!
*Consistent weekly forms (poomsae) practice - the Friendship Open is only a month away!
*Improving mile times now that I'm cleared to run and working distance up to the Spartan Race!
*Continuing my daily writing toward my goal of writing for every day for one year!

How are you doing with your goals? What are they! Let me know in the comments below!

*Being* An Athlete

*Being* An Athlete

I have always been active since I was a kid. Riding bikes, climbing trees, building forts (both winter and summer), playing cops & robbers, shooting BB guns and my brother's compound bow, riding the neighbor's horses, playing on the playgrounds, going on long walks with my dog, downhill and cross-country skiing, hiking with my family.... all part of an active and adventurous childhood.

Thankfully my mom never let us stay in and just "zone out" on the TV or play video games for endless hours - we always had to be active... and heaven forbid we EVER said the terrible words: "We're bored!" Oh, that was a recipe for many chores! Even if we had just finished them, there were ALWAYS more chores to do. Especially our dreaded one: ROCK PICKING!

So while I've never been especially sedentary, (with the possible exception of working insane hours in retail there for a few years) I've never particularly thought of myself as an athlete. Despite riding horses, doing Taekwondo for the majority of my life, frequent yoga practice, mountain biking, skiing, and being a regular at the gym, I was still taken aback when my Physical Therapist called me an "athlete."

Why?

Because my own "mental image" of myself isn't as one -- despite being a black belt in Taekwondo, an accomplished runner - including a half-marathon under my belt, hiking mountains, shooting my own bow, competing in martial arts tournaments, running races, riding my two horses, and being in the gym nearly every day of the week.

Because to me an "athlete" is an elite level artist in their sport, an Olympian, a professional, a competitor at the highest echelon. But does that make everyone who trains not an athlete if they aren't an Olympic sprinter? Of course not!

So, the question rises: WHY NOT ME!?

I realized the fault in my thinking is just another method of self-deprecation, another way of putting myself down and thinking I'm not good enough. How does *that* help me? It doesn't.

Two words to myself: STOP IT!

Of course there will always be someone faster, someone who can kick higher, someone more athletic, someone more accomplished, someone with more gold medals, someone who trains more hours a week. But that is no reason not to BELIEVE IN MYSELF!

I work actively to encourage and (hopefully!) inspire others.

People who don't even know each other have said that I am a great motivating force in their lives.

When I look in the mirror, why isn't that what I see?

So just as I won't let anyone talk themselves down over their accomplishments (any workout is better than none at all!) so too I have to monitor myself, EVEN & ESPECIALLY when it arises in a situation like this one where one simple word carried so much emotional impact.

I AM an ATHLETE!

Being one is just part of who I am, part of who I want to be, and even more representative of what I want to become.

Onward & upward!  BOOYA!

Competing at Utah Summer Games 2013

 Riding my mare Sebien at the Missoula Equestrian Park in Montana

 Hiking Timpanogos, UT Fall 2014

 Intercollegiate Horse Show Association (IHSA) Nationals, Cazenovia, NY 2002

 Bo staff training with my brother in his Taekwondo School, Bozeman, MT

 Hiking in The Needles, UT - Spring Break

 Shooting my bow

 Hiking Deseret Peak, UT - Summer 2014

 Missoula, MT Half Marathon - July 2011

 Doing forms in the desert - Arches National Park, UT

 Biking the Hiawatha Trail on the MT/ID border

 The very top of Mt. Timpanogos, UT Aug 2014

Mountain biking Rattlesnake Wilderness, MT

 Sparring at Livingston tournament MT

 Hiking THROUGH Stewart Falls, UT 2013

 Forms competition - Montana State Championships, Bozeman, MT

 Skiing Lost Trail/Powder Mountain at the border of MT & ID

 Skiing in MT

"Goodie Bag" Service Project For The Homeless/In Need

So, my husband and I have been talking for a while about helping those who are in need. Neither of us like to give money where it can potentially be misspent but we wanted to do something genuinely useful for those who are truly in need. 

We came up with the idea because I was talking to him about how very much I hate giving MONEY out at a stop sign, or whatever, but feel a genuine desire to help.

My kind and thoughtful husband has gone and bought deli food for the homeless vet by WalMart that had a sign that said "Hungry" - but that's only one meal.

The idea kind of came from two things: a desire to not give money, and the idea for a "new mommy" hospital kit that I thought about making for a few friends having babies a while ago. I tweaked the contents a little bit about researching what homeless people had access to in a shelter, but may still need. And then I did a little more reading on the kits that some others have put together. Then we went to see what we could find with an emphasis on shelf-stable foods that didn't need heating or utensils to eat. 

The toiletries idea came from the little things that you take for granted... until you don't have them anymore. A toothbrush and toothpaste, Chapstick and Kleenex were some of those things I would always like to have and that seem like luxuries rather than essentials.

Then, as the weather is changing, having a warm hat and gloves seemed appropriate. We thought about socks, but then we'd have to worry about men's/women's sizes, and we wanted these goodie bags to work for either gender.

We went shopping yesterday and made up a few "goodie bags" with items that could usually be found (relatively) inexpensively but would make an impact on the recipient. 

Our kits include: 

a fleece-lined hat, 

gloves, 

granola bars, 

cheese & crackers, 

cookies, 

herbal tea, 

fruit snacks, 

Kleenex, 

Chapstick, 

a pack of gum, 

cinnamon and butterscotch hard candies 

and a toothbrush and toothpaste in a travel kit. 

I sorted them all into equal piles, and then put into paper gift bags that were 2/$1 at the local Dollar Tree. I tied them shut with ribbons, and included an encouraging card. Now we will distribute them to folks who are in need. 

The text of the cards I got from another site doing a similar project, though I altered it as it was a touch religious. So I made it more neutral and added a quote. :) Mine read:

"Here is a little goodie bag for you:

You may be down on your luck right now, but this little bag is here to remind you that you are worth SO much, that there are people who care about you, and that there is always hope. Have a beautiful day!

Encouragement to others is something everyone can give. Somebody needs what you have to give. It may not be your money; it may be your time. It may be your listening ear. It may be your arms to encourage. It may be your smile to uplift. Who knows? -Joel Osteen"

Here are the goodie bag contents "in process" 

(I added a few more things later as I got them put together)

And here is the completed set with the card and ribbons to hold everything together.

Hopefully these will be appreciated. We budgeted $100 and spent just a little under that to make nine bags. (We were shooting for 10, but there were only 9 travel toothbrush kits on the shelf so we made do with that! LOL!)

When I was in college, I was part of the Golden Key Honors Society and we served meals at the homeless shelter, did highway clean-up, sang Christmas carols in the hospital and other service projects, so I really like doing these sorts of things, though without someone else coming up with the ideas I typically just donate to Red Cross, The Humane Society and my special favorite, Rolling Dog Ranch. I also donate to Lupus research for my sister-in-law, did the Ice Bucket Challenge for ALS (Lou Gehrig's disease) and always try to pick my (running) races that support breast cancer (Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure) or cancer research, or another charity. I even ran one to stop sex trafficking! So I'm definitely service-oriented. Here it seems as though most of those are through the church, so I wanted to come up with an idea that just my husband and I could do on a modest budget!

Someday we hope to do even more charity work, but for right now, it was a great start! I truly look forward to distributing these bags, and now I can keep my eye out for sales on some of these items so we can make more in the future!

My heart is so happy! <3